Archive for April, 2008

Wednesday Morning Dump

I hate to do this because I love the man like a 2nd father, but I need to take a quick dig at Francona. Not to nit-pick or ignore the fact that Lester and Halladay were both incredible last night, but Terry got away with a blunder. Not pinch running for Ortiz once he reached 2nd base in the 9th was an atrocious mistake. If Vernon Wells doesn’t bobble Youk’s hit then Papi is gunned out at home and we are playing all night, wasting Lester’s gem. I understand that Ellsbury is hurt, but Jed Lowry needs to be the guy that comes in there. Face it, even if Youk doesn’t come through, the ramifications of losing the DH wouldn’t be felt until for the next two or three innings. And even if he does come up again, he’s hitting .172. This isn’t the guy who has a 4 out of 5 chance of hitting a walk-off homer. Thank God Pedroia came up with that nasty play (which was even better than the one that saved Buchholz’s no-no) or Tito would be getting grilled this morning.

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Holla for some Hot Links


You stay classy, Chicago

Dan Lebatard makes sense of Bissenger, blogs and the aging mainstream media

Texting your way to love

Might not be worth the 35 grand, but the little brother is making the family proud down at Villanova.

The best Tom Cruise impersonation I have ever seen.

Calamari anyone?

Bruce Springsteen delivered the eulogy for his keyboard player Danny Federici last week. The man can put words together.

Kobe Bryant jumps over a speeding Aston Martin. Is this real or computer generated? You decide.

Have no fear, an extremely inappropriate clip is here!!!

For the Losties, a decent interview with Michael Emerson, aka Ben Linus.

Also, a recap of some of the better comments on last week’s LOST episode.

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The Adventures of Josh Bard, Hollywood Playboy


So we sent our very own Josh Bard to the White House Correspondents dinner to cover the event for the site. He forgot to do any actual journalism, but did manage to schmooze up half of Hollywood and pose for about 100 pictures. Here are some of the highlights…

I’ll start it off slowly: Bard and the Congressman who grilled Clemens. Not sure if he is going to be involved in the Mindy McCready statutory rape case or not.


Not a huge fan of our reigning Miss USA. Just doesn’t do it for me.



Huge fan of Olivia Wilde, who played Marissa’s hot blonde lesbian girlfriend on the OC. She does do it for me.

I didn’t know who Catherine Bell was, but after a quick peruse through the world wide web I learned that she has done a couple nude scenes in bad movies. Lets just say she looks good for 40.


Ashlee Simpson just before lip-syncing “get your hand off my ass!”

Now we come to the Top 5 Most Classic Pictures I Have Ever Seen, kicking it off with a great threesome pic. I love how Spencer is in the middle and not Heidi. Also, on another note, I would like to give Bardo some props for rocking the tux and holding his own with two people who pose for photos for a living.


Speaking of people who pose for a living…

Can we pause and reflect on how beautiful LC is. Seriously, there was a time when I was more of a Kristin Cavallari fan, but that has changed. I’m in love. Also, if I’m Bard I spend the rest of my life tracking down the goober who that-guyed this picture and killing him for almost ruining the greatest picture of my life.

(Note for my father and anyone else confused: LC is Lauren Conrad who was the star of the fake reality show Laguna Beach and is now the star of the completely staged guilty pleasure The Hills. The couple above is Heidi Montag, LC’s former best friend and current enemy, and Spencer Pratt, Heidi’s boyfriend or fiance or something)

Yes, that is one of our main contributors throwing game at Hollywood’s most eligible bachelorette. Whaaat uuup?


His next column will be detailing how he contracted hepatitis-C by putting his arm around someone. Seriously though, does she look used up or what?

If you’re a fan of HBO’s The Wire, then I’m sure you agree that I saved the best for last. If you’re not a fan, then thats your problem.

“MY NAME IS MY NAME!”

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Thank God for the DVR

by Josh Bard

It’s April, which is the perfect storm of sports. We’re just coming up for air from the NCAA tourney and if you breathe deeply, you’ll get that fresh mix of NBA playoffs, the NFL draft, and the maturation of the baseball season. If you breathe really deeply you may even catch some NHL playoff fever, although that might be pollen. I can’t tell because both make me sneeze.

Take tonight for example (Monday the 21st). The sports television possibilities tonight are enough to make even Supersonics fans excited again. First on the docket is Monday Night Baseball between the most interesting two National League teams, (which I understand is like saying the sexiest of those Mormon Polygamy Ranch Moms) the Cubs and the Mets. Nonetheless, Carlos Zambrano is always electric and he’s on the hill against an almost American League Mets offense.

With a simple click we’re transported to an NBA double-header between the Cavaliers/Wizards and the Rockets/Jazz. LeBron is wreaking more havoc on DC than tourists looking for cherry blossoms so that’s fun to watch from a distance. Rockets/Jazz Game 2 is a snoozer on paper but as a general rule, I don’t sleep on teams that win 22 games in a row.

Click, and we’re on the ice for another double-header. On one channel, the Washington Capitals fighting to force a game 7 with the Flyers, and the Bruins and Canadiens in their own elimination game on another. Yes, hockey on two channels. The next thing you know we’ll all be humming the O’Canada and putting gravy on French-fries. I live in DC and am from Boston and can confidently say that people in both cities legitimately think that they care about these two hockey teams right now. People have jumped onto their respective bandwagons so quickly that they forgot that, as a nation, we contractually signed hockey away two years ago (you were supposed to retain the pink copy for yourself).

As filler, there is more NFL pre-draft coverage than anyone knows what to do with, which is why it is scattered everywhere like King of the Hill re-runs. I think I just saw two “experts” doing a mock draft on what Mel Kiper’s next mock draft will look like. Hell, I’d rather watch Arena Football, conveniently airing on ESPN2.

So you see the problem right? While catching all of this is impossible without a well-oiled ‘Last’ button and double-jointed thumb, this is not my main concern. How am I, a self-diagnosed sportsaholic, supposed to pretend to balance and keep track of all these results on a television night featuring How I Met Your Mother, Intervention, and The Hills?

Well thank god for DVR or as I like to call it, God’s button. As a culture I don’t know how we didn’t create this invention earlier and as a culture I don’t know how we haven’t awarded it some flavor of the Nobel Prize. Peace Prize: How many marital fights have been avoided by being able to watch one program and record another? Medicine Prize: No more being concerned that you’re missing Scrubs because you have to see Lost. Physics Prize: Why is there always so much frigging delay when I hit that Swap button?

I’d previously used God’s button for conflicts of interest, like when Top Chef was up against The Gauntlet 3 and both would be water cooler conversations the next day. Now God’s button has come back and one up-ed itself. I can watch my favorite Monday night staples at halftimes, commercials, and postgames (and in full disclosure, first and third quarters too). I’m downright giddy to think about how soon I’ll pretend to watch Monday Night Football! My fantasy baseball team, apathy for the Bruins (and really anything on ice that isn’t a fat person slipping), and crush on Lauren Conrad can live in harmony.

Like it says in the Bible, “God saw all that He had made, and behold, it was very good.”

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SFP’s Mock NFL Draft

The NFL Draft is less than 10 days away, and every sports website is buzzing with mock drafts, predictions, and insight. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Sports Fan Paradise does not listen to experts. Experts have said that Ryan Leaf is a can’t-miss pick and that Secret Talents of the Stars would be a hit with all demographics. They just aren’t right a lot of the time. Here at SFP we listen to fans and fans only. That is why this year’s mock draft will look different than most you are used to seeing. We have compiled a group of 25 pigskin enthusiasts, each of whom will pick for their favorite team, their hometown team, or a team that they are very familiar with. These are the real predictions, straight from the people who care.

1. Jake Long, OL, Michigan
With the first pick the Dolphins are going Long, but it will not be Chris. While new boss Bill Parcells had plenty of success with another UVA defender in Chris Canty, but Miami’s offensive line needs to be addressed first. Jake Long could become the ‘Phins best lineman since pro-bowler Richmond Webb. Even if he doesn’t turn into the stud left tackle experts project, he can certainly be a serviceable choice at right tackle or guard. Miami can’t afford to have this pick be a bust.
-Mike Barber

2. Chris Long, DE, Virginia
The war room was split on the long-term prospects of Chris Long, a high IQ defensive end from the University of Virginia, and Glenn Dorsey, the hulking up-the-middle run-stopper from LSU.

St. Louis ranked in the bottom third of the league in rushing defense, passing defense and sacks in 2007, making the defensive front a high priority for the second straight off-season. Dorsey is a beast, topping 300 pounds while remaining quick and agile, and would have been a perfect fit along the Rams’ defensive front, allowing the team to push 2007 first-round pick Adam Carriker to defensive end. But Long, a two-time captain at Virginia who became the first active player in program history to have his jersey retired, gets the nod.

Dorsey may have more upside, but that pick comes with legitimate injury concerns. Although he never missed a game at LSU, he battled nagging injuries that prevented him from entering the NFL draft after the 2006 season. Long, however, is injury free. He may not have the potential star power of Dorsey, but he’s going to be a gritty, gutsy, longtime performer in the NFL. The upshot could be that of his father, Howie, who made eight trips to the Pro Bowl. Think of this as the defensive line version of Ryan Leaf versus Peyton Manning. Leaf had the big arm, the measurables, but Manning was the safe pick; an intellectual with the NFL pedigree who, at worst, will be a solid regular for years to come. That’s Chris Long, and at No. 2, there isn’t room to make an error.
-Chuck McGill

3. Matt Ryan, QB, Boston College
The Falcons finished their 2007 campaign ranked 29th in points allowed, 29th in points scored, and 32nd in federal indictments. Needless to say, the team has a number of needs heading into the draft. The good news for the Falcons is that they have eleven picks, including four in the first round and a half, to address them. Drafting Matt Ryan addresses two pressing needs: a quarterback that isn’t Joey Harrington and a face for the franchise that will allow people to forget about Ron Mexico and his Bad Newz Kennels. A young core of Ryan, Michael Turner, and Roddy White have the potential to put some points on the board and start the franchise on its long march back to the playoffs.
-Hank Spring

4. Glenn Dorsey, DL, LSU
Although popular sentiment has the Raiders taking Darren McFadden in this spot, the numbers don’t lie. Oakland’s defense was last in the NFL in Yards-Per-Carry allowed last year. Dorsey is incredibly quick for his size, and is a superb run stopper. A very hard worker, Dorsey could be the catalyst for a defense that needs one. Also, the Raider’s already locked up a solid running back by signing Justin Fargas to a contract extension after he ended the ‘07 season strong. McFadden may be the flashy pick, but Dorsey is the smart one.
-Mike Crimmings

5. Ryan Clady, OT, Boise State
After finishing dead last in the AFC West last season, the Kansas City Chiefs need to get back to what they do best: running the football. While it may be tempting to draft stud running back Darren McFadden, that is not KC’s chief need. Their running game has not been the same since the loss of William Roaf and Willie Shields a few years ago. If they don’t add a solid offensive tackle they will be wasting the primes of back Larry Johnson, as well as guard Brian Waters. Clady has two full years of big-time college experience at left tackle, and has the speed and agility to be a force in the running game.
-Robert Sheftell

6. Darren McFadden, RB, Arkansas
The Jets pretty much need everything, even after spending 2 billion dollars this spring in free agency. Despite their varied needs, it is too tough to pass up on the most explosive play maker in the draft. McFadden and Thomas Jones will be a formidable 1-2 punch in the Jets’ backfield. Now they just need Kellen Clemens to stop playing like Patrick Ramsey.
-Steve Gallen

7. Vernon Gholston, DE/OLB, Ohio State
First off, I really believe that the Patriots will trade away the 7th overall pick. They don’t have another first round pick thanks to Mr. Roger S. Goodell, which means their next pick won’t be until the 62nd overall. Bill Belichick and GM Scott Pioli are obviously open and willing to trade picks. Since they took over drafting duties 8 years ago they have made 25 draft weekend trades. The Patriots are also know for drafting value over necessity, which means they wont draft a player higher than they think he’s worth. The problem here is that their biggest necessity is at the cornerback position, where they have lost Pro Bowler Asante Samuel as well as Randall Gay to free agency, and there are no corners in the draft worth a top-ten pick. If the Patriots are able to trade down, look for them to take Mike Jenkins from South Florida, Aqib Talib from Kansas or Troy’s Leodis McKelvin.

If the Patriots do make a selection with this pick, Vernon Gholston from Ohio St. would be a good selection, and and would keep in line with the Belichick drafting philosophy. Gholston is a 6’3’’, 266 lb DE who ran a 4.65 40 at the combine. He would be a great fit as an OLB in the Patriots 3-4 defense. With the departure of Roosevelt Colvin and possibly Junior Seau, as well the fact that both Tedy Bruschi and Mike Vrabel are another year older, adding a linebacker is the move to make. It will also allow Vrabel to move back to middle linebacker in the 3-4. Gholston is considered one of the top pass rushers in this year’s draft, proving his ability against the toughest the Big 10 has to offer, including 3 sacks when matched up against potential #1 pick Jake Long. Last year Gholston recorded 14 sacks, breaking the Ohio St. recorded previously held by fellow Buckeye alum Vrabel.

One weakness that might have the Patriots avoiding Gholston on draft day is his inconsistency. Of his 14 sacks last year, 11 were against Michigan, Wisconsin, Northwestern and Kent State. He only had 3 sacks in the other 9 games. Gholston has the physical ability to dominate any day and seems to step up for the big games. With Belichick’s talent for getting the most out of his players, I don’t expect his inconsistency in the past to make that much of an impact on the Patriots decision. Gholston only started playing football his sophomore year in high school and is still considered raw. If Belichick and the other veteran linebackers are able to mold him, the sky’s the limit. Gholston seems to fit into the Patriots philosophy off the field as well. His head coach at Ohio St., Jim Tressel, told reporters “He’s a humble, respectful man and he’s bright. He’s a special guy.” The one quality that a player must have to be drafted by the Patriots is intelligence. Gholston’s work ethic is also highly praised. He spends countless hours in the weight room and can bench over 470 pounds. If the Patriots do decide to make a selection with their 7th overall pick, Gholston is a cant miss, NFL ready player. Gholston and fellow OLB Adaleus Thomas would be a defensive force as the Patriots continue to dominate the NFL.
-Andrew Weiner

8. Branden Albert, OL, Virginia
Albert could fill a hole in the Ravens weak offensive line and bolster the Ravens attempt at making Troy Smith into a serviceable NFL quarterback, which may be a priority with Matt Ryan off the board. The Ravens’ running game came into its own in the second half of last year and have the type of wide receivers that can change a game, but Baltimore QBs were sacked 39 times last year. Sure, an aging defense is a priority for the Ravens, but you cant win if you don’t score. Write that down.
-Josh Bard

9. Sedrick Ellis, DT, USC
As much as the Bengals would like to trade Chad Johnson to the Chargers for a 4th round pick and shock the world by taking DeSean Jackson at #9 (similar to Miami’s Teddy Ginn pick of ‘07), Marvin Lewis wants to rectify the defense. The best player on the board to help an ailing defensive line is Sedrick Ellis, defensive tackle, USC.
-Csaba Sukosd

10. Keith Rivers, OLB, USC
The New Orleans Saints had the 4th best offense in the league last season, so to improve on their 7-9 record they must address the other side of the ball, specifically a passing defense that ranked 30th out of 32 teams. Given that scenario, the obvious pick out be Troy corner Leodis McKelvin. That said, the team drafted a CB in the 3rd round last year and added free agents Jason David and Randall Gay to strengthen the defensive backfield. With the stud D-lineman Dorsey, Ellis, Long and Gholston off the board, it is likely that the Saints will snag Rivers to play next to newly acquired Jonathan Vilma to solidify them at linebacker.
-Mike Stiriti


11. Malcom Kelly, WR, OU
The bottom line is that the Buffalo Bills need a tall wide receiver and they need one now. After Kelly struggled at the scout workout he became a shoe in for the Bills, since they love taking chances on injury-prone players loaded with upside. Kelly is a freakishly good athlete but whether or not he is durable enough for the NFL is a question.
-Jason King

12. Limas Sweed, WR, Texas
The three main needs that the Denver Broncos must address in the upcoming draft are offensive tackle, defensive tackle and wide receiver. Here are the three problems: 1) Ryan Clady, who would have fit well in Denver’s running attack, was snagged by yours truly to help the Chiefs’ ground game. The only other tackle worth a 12 pick is Jeff Otah, and I think he is just too big to fit into the mold of a Denver lineman. 2) Dorsey and Ellis are gone, and any other DT is a reach. 3) Taking the most talented player available, either pass rusher Derrick Harvey or corner McKelvin, would mean adding to positions where they are already deep. The best move for Denver is to add another target for Jay Cutler and take a chance on a guy like Sweed.
-Robert Sheftell

13. Chris Williams, OT, Vanderbilt
Nevermind the smoke screens indicating that Rashard Mendenhall or Derrick Harvey will be the pick. The Carolina Panthers are hell-bent on getting a left tackle to Charlotte, which would allow them to move Travelle Wharton inside to guard where he could dominate. If they can, they will feign interest in the aforementioned Mendenhall or Harvey and trade back a few spots, but for these purposes we’ll pick Chris Williams. A cerebral and enormous LT from Vandy with a great track record (1 sack allowed as a senior) against the toughest conference in college football. Best case scenario? Williams becomes just good enough on the left side that the Panthers can inexplicably release him three years from now (see: Wahle, Hartwig).
-Karaoke Craig Juer (for more of Craig, visit NVDaily.com)

14. Jeff Otah, OT, Pittsburgh
The Bears won’t be able to win with the quarterbacks they have now, so that has to be a priority. Since there are no QBs worth taking in the top-15, look for them to trade back or settle on the best player available. They need to improve their offense, but I like Cedric Benson at running back and their wide outs aren’t bad, so that just leaves the line. The best lineman available is Pittsburgh’s Jeff Otah.
-Ty Kennedy

15. Derrick Harvey, DE, Florida
First of all, let me say that the Lions should do something on draft day, anything, to land Ocho Cinco. (Editor’s note: Something in the dirty Detroit water makes these people obsess over wide receivers every April. Like the cherry blossoms in DC, its a freaking tradition). If they are picking at 15, however, they need to do something to aid what was the NFL’s worst defense last year. Taking the best defensive player on the board is a good first step.
-Troy Scarbrough

16. Rashard Mendenhall, RB, Illinois
I like Marcel Shipp, but lets face it, the Cardinals’ running game sucks. There were three teams with worse running games than Arizona last year, but thats it. Jeff Otah would have been a solid pick but he didn’t make it to 16, to Mendenhall will have to be the guy.
-Mitch Williams

17. Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie, CB, Tennessee State
Love the name, love the game. This is a “best athlete available” pick. Antoine Winfield into his 30’s, I’ll take Rodgers-Cromartie to line up opposite him and solidify the defensive secondary. Plus I’d like to see how he abbreviates his name on the back of his jersey.
-Tony Reali

18. Jonathan Stewart, RB, Oregon

First of all I shouldnt be drafting for the Texans because they’re doing fine on their own. The laast two years they had huge success with first round picks Mario Williams and Amobi Okoye and have begun shoring up a defensive (that’s without mentioning 2006 Rookie of the Year DeMeco Ryans at LB). This year the first pick has to be one to help the offense.

This isn’t a terrible offense either, last year with Andre Johnson (absolute stud) in the lineup, the Texans went 6-3. The running game was hardly ever running however. Some stats: 0 100 yard rushing games for Texans backs, top rusher ran for 58 yards a game, at least 5 running backs featured due to injury. Seems like someone needs fresh blood in the backfield. Jonathan Stewart, a back with good speed, can can catch short passes and even stand up to a blitzing linebacker. With Ahman Green still around, injury-prone Stewart won’t have to take all the carries.

-Josh Bard

19. DeSean Jackson, WR, Cal
Everyone knows the Eagle’s are in need of a star wide receiver, not only to put points on the board but also to inspire the fans. TO’s short-lived stint as an Eagle did not prove to be what the Eagles or the fans were looking for. We need someone agile, someone with speed, someone who is difficult to tackle in the open field and not a pompous ass. We need DeSean Jackson. He has versatility as a wide receiver and punt return man. Yeah there are other needs, Brian Dawkins will eventually need to be replaced and I’m sure Jimmy Johnson will say there’s a need for a defensive lineman, but those are not primary concerns. Andy Reid has only taken a wide receiver in the first round once as head coach for the Eagles.This is his chance to make amends.
-Rachel Slater

20. Devin Thomas, WR, Michigan State
The Bucs could probably address any position on offense and it would fill a need, but I think Devin Thomas not only adds playmaking ability to an aging receiving corps, but also gives Tampa a much-needed weapon in the return game, an area the Bucs have famously struggled in (their lone kickoff return last season was the first in their 31-year history).
-Kenny Gustin


21. Phillip Merling, DE, Clemson
The Redskins haven’t drafted a defensive lineman in the first round during the Dan Snyder regime, with the last first-day pick being DE Kenard Lang in 1997. Coincidentally, the Redskins have continued to lack a consistent pass rush through the years, instead spending the majority of first round picks on defensive backs (which, unfortunately, could still be a position option this year with cornerbacks Shawn Springs a year older and Carlos Rogers coming off an ACL injury).
Merling provides an instant starting option at defensive end with good size and speed and could supplant aging Phillip Daniels in the starting lineup across from Andre Carter.
The Skins will pass on DE Calais Campbell, ending their year-to-year courtship of Miami Hurricanes, and will use their second and third round picks to address needs at receiver and offensive line.
-Tim Tassa


22. Leodis McKelvin, CB, Troy

It’s not like the ‘boys have a lot of serious needs after a 13-3 season. But there is a draft to be held and, with this year’s Cowboys draft, we’re talking o-line help, extra wideout options, bolstering the secondary and maybe another back now that Jones is gone.

It’s no secret, though, that, at this point, the Cowboys’ biggest offseason options concerns to be outside of their two end-of-the-round picks. There’s all the Pacman Jones talk (risky, but it’d take care of the corner concerns), talk of Marion Barber being paid like a feature back (http://blogs.dallasobserver.com/unfairpark/2008/04/deep_blue_something_or_why_mar.php), and talk of moving up to take who Jerry Jones sees as the best player available, Darren McFadden.

If the ‘boys don’t move up for McFadden, don’t follow through on Pacman Jones and don’t give Marion Barber a fat contract, then all bets are off. But if the Pacman deal happens, the Barber contract gets made and the McFadden trades falter–the most likely scenario, it seems–the Cowboys will go with the best player available. Here that means Leodis McKelvin, a top half of the round talent who has inexplicably slipped this far. With Pacman and McKelvin on board, the secondary is no longer a concern–it’s a strength.

Expect the ‘boys to start looking at tier two of the OL, WR, and RB crop with pick No. 28.

-Pete Freedman (for more of Pete, visit dallasobserver.com)

23. Kenny Phillips, S, Miami
The Steelers are going to gamble and select Phillips, a safety from the U. The Steelers were solid on defense last season, but one thing they lacked was strong pass coverage. Drafting Phillips would allow Pittsburgh to switch to a Tampa-2 style of Cover Two defense, one that coach Mike Tomlin has been coveting since he took the job.
-Ryan King

24. Felix Jones, RB, Arkansas

After using a crane to pick its jaw up off the floor following the Cowboys’ selection, the Tennessee Titans select Arkansas running back Felix Jones with the 24th pick. Thanks Jerry. In lieu of a thank you card, the Titans will foot the bill for your next Botox treatment.
The Titans could have went any number of ways with this pick, but with Jones on the board, it became the “best player available” pick. Jones rushed for 2,400 yards the past two years……as a backup. Seeing as how Jones is just as fast and strong as McFadden, it’s like landing a top-5 pick at the end of the first round. The Titans haven’t been this lucky in….well….forever.
The departure of Chris Brown to the Texans leaves the Titans with one half-decent back, LenDale White, and who knows how much weight he’s gained this offseason. White rushed for 1,100 yards last year, but he did it on 864 carries.

Yeah, the Titans take Jones without thinking twice.
-Ryan Sonner

25. Kentwan Balmer, DL, UNC
The General Manager of the Seattle Seahawks, Tim Ruskell, is excited for this year’s draft. Not because he is locked in on one guy to help his team, but because unlike other years he enters it with a lot of freedom. He explains, “This is one of the few drafts we have gone into where we don’t really feel hostage to a position.” This tells me that Seattle is going to snag the best player available, and maybe even take a bit of a chance.

Even with the addition of Julius Jones they could use help at running back, since Shaun Alexander looks to be as done as a thin steak on a Ponderosa buffet. They could use more depth on both lines and at wide receiver, but then again, who couldn’t?

The smart pick for Ruskell, the one with the most upside, is Kentwan Balmer. Ranked in the top 15 on a lot of people’s talent lists, Balmer has (wait for it…wait for it…) tremendous upside. He has D-end speed with D-tackle size. A perfect fit on the inside of a 4-3. At worst, he is Dan “Big Daddy” Wilkinson, but at best he could be closer to Richard Seymour.
-Mike Stiriti


26. Lawrence Jackson, DE, USC
Defensive end is easily the biggest need position for the Jaguars, and the best guys left on the board are Miami’s 6-foot-8 Calais Campbell and USC’s Lawrence Jackson. Campbell is the more intriguing posibility — a guy that big could make a quarterback’s life miserable by being in his field of vision as much as coming off the weak side. However, a pedestrian junior season created questions about Campbell’s motor and work ethic. Jackson, on the other hand, could have gone into the draft a year ago, but stayed put and only got better. Auburn’s Quentin Groves is also an option here.
-Karaoke Craig Juer

27. Carl Nicks, OT, Nebraska
The chargers are a team that are dependent on the run and they have a hole at the tackle spot. A lot of guys in the San Diego area might want to take my boy Gosder Cherlius out of B.C., but he apparently looked like a chicken with his head cut off during the 3-cone drill at the combine. In Nicks, the Chargers are getting a brutish fellow (6-4, 341) with some mobility that could help pave the way for L.T. to pick up some yards.

The only downside is that this guy seems to be a serious (serious) headcase. He’s got legal issues going on now (disorderly conduct), and there are some rumors out there that he’s literally told coaches to go f*** themselves. A lot of times teams get lucky when top players drop down on draft-day because of headcase rumors. Maybe San Diego can join the list.
-Dave Fialkov


28. James Hardy, WR, Indiana
The Cowboys need to address the problem of their aging wide receivers, and the 28th pick is the time to do it. Tony Romo will be under center in Big D for a while, and they need to start surrounding him with young play makers, not just guys in their 30s like TO and Teresea Glenn. Hardy is a prototypical NFL wide receiver, with the size and physical skills superior to the other wide outs available at this point. Plus, Hardy will be able to learn from TO, another 220 pounder. There are some character issues with Hardy, but that is hardly a concern for Jerry Jones.
-Steve Stiriti

29. Jerod Mayo, OLB, Tennessee
It is just cruel punishment for 49ers fans to make them pick 29th after watching how terrible they were both offensively and defensively last year. They probably need more help on offense than defense, as they could use a tackle and a play making receiver. OT Gosder Cherilus would be the pick here if they go offensively because all of the receivers worth a 1st round pick are off the board. Defensively they could use both an ILB to play alongside Patrick Willis and a pass rushing OLB for the 3-4 scheme. If Jerod Mayo or Quentin Groves are still available at this point they would both be great picks. Mayo’s stock has been on the rise lately and he is considered a high character player, which has been a big focus of Mike Nolan’s rebuilding process. The 49ers would then address the o-line or receiver at the beginning of the 2nd round.
-Devin Blessing

30. Brandon Flowers, CB, Virginia Tech
Despite improving from a four win team in 2005 to an eight win team in 2006 and then to a 13 win team in 2007, the Packers are looking exceedingly mediocre heading into the 2008 season. If you don’t have cable or Internet, Brett Favre retired a few months ago and the Pack are counting on an unproven quarterback from Cal to continue their franchise tradition. The popular pick in Green Bay may be to look quarterback in the first round, with Brian Brohm or Chad Henne still looking for a new town to make their home. I think the wise decision is to forego drafting a QB, avoiding an unnecessary controversy prior to the start of mini–camp. After all, many teams have proven that college success at the quarterback position does not equate to NFL success. The fact is, Green Bay’s secondary, which was by all means impressive last year, is getting old. Unless Charles Woodson and Al Harris (31 and 33, respectively) stumble upon the same fountain of youth that Favre was drinking from, the Packers better start thinking about the future of their secondary. And better yet, why not get the young guns acclimated before the seasoned vets hit the wall? The best corner left in the draft at this point is Brandon Flowers from Virginia Tech. Slightly undersized, he is a solid play maker with a proven ability to come up in big spots and will provide the Packers with a dependable defender in the future.
-Dan Rosenblum

31. Tyrell Johnson, S, Arkansas

The Super Bowl Champs are in the unique position of not having any glaring needs on the team. We will mostly be drafting for depth in this draft. I gave consideration to either Aqib Talib or Mike Jenkins here, which would give us a bookend corner for the next 7 years along with Aaron Ross, since I’m not totally convinced Corey Webster has turned the corner even though he was AWESOME in the playoffs last year. In both their cases, I’m surprised they dropped this far, since both hold mid-first round grades. Who cares if Mr. Talib enjoys the sweet, sweet reefer on occasion? Calvin Johnson smoked his share of the kind herb, and he still went number 3.
Anyway, if there was a need position for the G-men, it would be safety, since Gibril Wilson followed the Bandwagon of the Overpaid back to his crib, Oakland, CalifornI-A. You could also make a case for taking a Tight End at this spot since it seems Jeremy Shockey is on his way out the door. Actually, let me touch on that for a sec…
WE CANNOT TRADE SHOCKEY. JERRY REESE, PLEASE LISTEN TO ME. I know Kevin Boss showed flashes of playmaking ability in the playoffs last year, but let’s not jump to conclusions. He’s not ready to be our #1 TE. He can’t block, though we do have Stone-Hands Mike Matthews to do that. He only had 6 or 7 catches in the playoffs last year, if memory serves, so he doesn’t have a body of work that proves he can be the man. I must admit though that each of those 6 catches he had were insanely clutch. Just thinking about his catch on the sideline that Eli floated perfectly over the Dallas defense during our game-saving drive at the end of the first half gives me a chub.
Lawrence Tynes?! YES! 5 more years of heart attacks? Oye.
Sorry about that… anyway, don’t trade Shockey. Please. If anything, don’t do it because I don’t want my Giants jersey wardrobe to become obsolete. First Ike Hilliard leaves, then Tiki retires. If Shockey leaves, I’m left with Super Bowl MVP Eli Manning, which, isn’t so bad after all. You’ll never hear an ill-word about Eli from me again.

So yeah, Tyrell Johnson. He has been skyrocketing up the boards because of his athletic ability, so I don’t think we can wait until the 2nd round to get him. He fits our team perfectly. He is strong as hell, which was shown by his 27 reps on the bench at the combine, and he plays with a mean streak. He needs to improve on his cover skills, but he’ll have time because we signed Sammy Knight as a stop-gap, which I like a lot.

Hey Michael, you coming back next year? Let us know soon please. Thanks. If he doesn’t, we need to move Mathia Kiwanuka back to DE, then trade up in the second round and pick Tavares Gooden from the U. Boom.

-Steve Gallen

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Monday Funday

Picture of the Day:
(note: we had this up 3 hours before barstool, i don’t want to hear 1 comment)


thanks to tristan


Link of the Day:

Keep in mind this kid isn’t even 3 and he doesn’t speak English.

thanks to daousty


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Opening Day Morning Dump

So the Red Sox couldn’t find anyone better to represent the 2004 World Series champs besides Curtis Leskanic? Really? Curt Schilling couldn’t have stepped out of the dugout for that? Really?

I have to say it, I thought the entire Bill Buckner thing was ridiculous. On surface it looked like he was being accepted by Red Sox Nation, like the standing ovation somehow wiped away 20+ years of hatred and contempt that ruined this dude’s life. There is an expression in sports about how a fan base or a columnist can “run a player out of town.” In the case of Buckner, the combination of Dan Shaughnessy and the old “Red Sox Nation” ran him all the way to Idaho where the death threats couldn’t reach him.

This is what pisses me off: The “Nation” (which is a bunch of bullshit contrived by an overstaffed marketing department) does not consist of the die hard Sox fans who were devastated in ‘86. It consists of rich guys with their pink-hatted wives and bratty kids who can afford to enter Fenway Park. These aren’t the people who hated Buckner, since they didn’t give a shit about the Sox until sometime around 2003. Buckner was not “forgiven” yesterday, he was cheered by a bunch of idiots who don’t know Jody Reed from Luis Rivera. The real Sox fans, the ones who have lived and died with the team their whole lives, the ones who seriously contemplated a quick trip off the Tobin after Buckner’s error, were watching the game at Sullivan’s Tap or Murphy’s Law and booing old Buck when he walked onto the field.

Not that I think Buckner deserved all the criticism. He didn’t. The game was already tied and it was only Game 6. If he plays that ball cleanly they still need to win an extra-inning game on the road. I am just sick of everyone saying that Buckner should be forgiven because of how good a player he was. The fact is that he was an average guy who made an error that has been over-analyzed for years at the financial gain of leeches like Shaughnessy. He didn’t deserve death threats…but he also didn’t deserve a standing ovation. He wasn’t even with Boston for 5 years, he hit .278 while with the team, never in his career hit over 20 home runs, and is remember for a costly fielding error.

Maybe tonight they should bring back Grady Little so that he can get a standing ovation.

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Source: New Yankee Stadium Progress Stalled


NEW YORK CITY, New York — It appears that the the construction of the New York Yankees new stadium, scheduled to open in April of 2009, has been moving at a snail’s pace. Contractor’s blame the lack of progress on the fact that they didn’t hire any workers under the age of 38. They felt that getting big name construction workers would bring credibility to the project, but they did not count on the amount of injuries that would be suffered on the job. In addition to the fatigue, the project has gone way over budget, due to the large contracts given to the workers.

If the stadium is not completed for the ‘09 opener, the Yankees may be forced to play their home games at Shea Stadium. Hank Steinbrenner is excited by the idea, as it would give him a chance to lure “that Pedro kid” from the Mets.

-MS

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